And now on to the final set of questions. The responses to some of the questions are a little imaginative because I am alone in a room, not sharing them with someone else.
25. Make three true “we” statements each. For instance, “We are both in this room feeling … ” We are both in the room feeling awkward, alone, vulnerable.
26. Complete this sentence: “I wish I had someone with whom I could share …” My novel when it is complete. Someone who could read it like a reader, someone who reads the types of things I write, someone who could possibly edit it for form and content.
27. If you were going to become a close friend with your partner, please share what would be important for him or her to know. Don’t be condescending to me. When I am feeling less than, notice and respond. Listen when I talk to you. When you need or want something from me, articulate that clearly.
28. Tell your partner what you like about them; be very honest this time, saying things that you might not say to someone you’ve just met. I like the way you are in control when we are having sex. I like that you persevere and have your eye on something bigger in your business.
29. Share with your partner an embarrassing moment in your life. Once in my freshman year of college a few of us were standing around punching each other lightly in the stomach because we were all skinny (which made us seem muscular) or actually muscular. My boyfriend at the time punched me lightly in the stomach (at my insistence), and I farted. Loudly. I couldn’t laugh it off, so I just walked away, into someone else’s dorm room, and stayed there for a while.
30. When did you last cry in front of another person? By yourself? By myself? All the time. In the car when a certain song plays, reading, thinking. In front of someone else? When my spouse and I watched Pete’s Dragon last week.
31. Tell your partner something that you like about them already. This is obviously not meant for old married couples, so I’ll think of a different time. I like the way you make me feel worth listening to, worth sharing something intimate with, worth the risk.
32. What, if anything, is too serious to be joked about? Not sure. I’m a gallows humor kind of person.
33. If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone? Why haven’t you told them yet? I would regret not telling each of my children that although they can do more, be more, that whatever they are, whatever they become, is enough. Enough for them, enough for me. Why haven’t I told them? Because I still want them to be all that they can be, clichéd as that sounds.
34. Your house, containing everything you own, catches fire. After saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely make a final dash to save any one item. What would it be? Why? My work is saved on the cloud, but at one point I would have said my work in progress and my journals. The same is true for most photos. I don’t really have a treasured, irreplaceable material item that I can think of.
35. Of all the people in your family, whose death would you find most disturbing? Why? One of my children. The why is obvious.
36. Share a personal problem and ask your partner’s advice on how he or she might handle it. Also, ask your partner to reflect back to you how you seem to be feeling about the problem you have chosen. I need to earn income again at some point but I don’t have faith that what I am doing will ever produce income. But I am afraid to go back to work and give up the peace I’ve found writing in a quiet home.